So, last week I had surgery on the lazy eye. Do not stress out. It is still lazy, just not as lazy. It got a work improvement plan, I suppose. Anyway, so a post to the lazy eye.
The benefits of having a lazy eye...
1.) Well, you can look at people (especially good looking men) without them noticing. Basically spying is a breeze.
2.) You can pretend you don't see people (and thus, hear) people talk to/at you. Therefore when the boss has a project to assign, you don't have to do it because um...."Boss, I wasn't even looking at you...were you talking to me?"
3.) You can blog about it when nothing else is exciting enough to blog about.
4.) You can have 2 computer screens at work and feel completely justified....one for each eye.
5.) The peripheral vision creates a whole new world. One time my friend tried to kick me on the bum from the side as we walked...I caught her leg before it hit me and just had to say "Lazy Eye." Did she ever try that again? I think not! The lazy eye is full of protection.
6.) It makes me a statistic. In fact, the kind of thing that happened to my lazy eye happens to only 5% of people with lazy eyes.... The real question is...is that the top 5% or the bottom 5%? Am I an over achiever or under achiever?
7.) Sometimes people can't tell if I am looking at them or not and I say, "I am looking at you...I have a lazy eye." Then, the other person feels embarrassed and for at least 2 minutes, I have their sympathy and can get them to do anything I desire. Dang it...I am not manipulating people. :)
8.) The lazy eye produces random surgeries and therefore I get to sleep for like 4 days straight on crazy drugs without anyone being concerned. (Not the best reason though, let's be honest.)
9.) It gives my Pops and I a special bond....for he has a lazy eye too.
10.) It gives me "character." As if I needed anymore. At first, when the lazy eye came back when I started college, it was embarrassing, but then it became awesomely cool. I will take what I get. Weaknesses become strengths. Just saying.
11.) The following picture is a blackmail picture for sure, but just whatever. It was taken the day after surgery. I was on painkiller drugs, I was looking sick nasty. But that there is the eyes. Beautiful. Holla! *On a side note, I sent this pic to my co-worker to show her the eye and when I went back to work today, a co worker had this picture up as her screen saver. Now, that's love....yah, right. Ha ha.
-T and her Fantastic Eyes.
6 comments:
I am a fan of your lazy eye. Heretofore to be referred to as Gangsta I. Gangsta I and I have a special bond. I make jokes with you about it... you make jokes about it... we laugh. So basically Gangsta I makes people happy. I would not be suprised if Gangsta I gets into heaven and i don't. also i loved this blog it was my favorite since the one where i called someone a chicken S. Also. Your eye looks sexalicious! You are so freaking Hot. and glamorous. :)
Reason number 12 we love the lazy eye...if you and I ever have kids, they are SCREWED...which is funny so it's another great reason to laugh. But then again if we had a kid and they were deaf in one ear, they could make up for it by having a killer range of vision with their lazy eye, so they could see better and thus not miss as much of what is going on around them as they would with a deaf ear and two un-lazy eyes...are you following...
So glad all went well! I need to see you and your lazy eye soon! As far a being adopted into the Bennett family, it is a strict and rigorous process, but if I can do it you can! :) Love you! See you soon!
yeaaaaaaaaaah! look at chu! i hope it's all healed up and doing wonderful. I will give it kisses next time i'm in town! love love love you bff!
Always love your posts!!!
YEAH! You better be doing those eye exercises to keep it there!
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